that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
