? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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