THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
