What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
