i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
then he tried to convert me to islam
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize