Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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