i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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