Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
