Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
porn star boner night. come get it.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
