And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
