I need help removing her.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
