Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
