Got a toothbrush?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
