Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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