i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize