Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Randomize