That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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