when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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