a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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