I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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