Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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