he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize