im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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