I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize