ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
