Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
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