I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
