She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
