Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I love having hate sex.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
