butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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