I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
