coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
