Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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