i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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