in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
