i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize