Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
