Whats the glycemic index on semen?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Randomize
