I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
