two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
