Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
