I love black thongs
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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