Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
My pussy is not your playground.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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