that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
