I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
