I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
