You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Found the puke drawer
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
