I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
