i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
