called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
