Hey man sorry I got all grabby
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
