He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
